Miko Grimes, wife of Tampa Bay Buccaneer Brent Grimes, is no stranger to making headlines. While Brent was playing for the Dolphins last season, Miko was arrested for allegedly head-butting Miami police right outside of the Dolphins stadium just prior to her husband’s game on Sept. 27, 2015. She has followed that up this offseason by spewing some crazy rhetoric, like this vaguely anti-Semitic quote taken directly from her Twitter account on July 11: “Gotta respect ross for keeping his jew buddies employed but did he not see how tannenbaum put the jets in the dumpster w/that sanchez deal?”
What Grimes, who played professional basketball overseas after college, said was a stupid quote for sure, but it may not even rank in the Hall of Fame of dumbest athlete quotes ever uttered. Here is that list …
No. 10: “I can go right, I can go left, I’m amphibious.” – Former NBA player Charles Shackleford.
Amphibious, you say? Perhaps if Shackleford had been concentrating a bit more on his adeptness on land (only), he would have had more a bit more of a prolific career than his 5.4 points per game in the NBA.
No. 9: “Fade into Bolivian, I guess.” – Mike Tyson
Mike Tyson has said and done a lot of crazy things, including receiving a facial tattoo. This quote may be one of the crazier things he has ever said. Though, come to think about it, I bet the climate in Bolivia would be quite a nice place to “fade” into…
No. 8: “Don’t say I don’t get along with my teammates. I just don’t get along with some of the guys on the team.” – Terrell Owens
Owens had a long and potentially Hall of Fame NFL career. But nobody ever accused him of being the smartest guy in the NFL. This is one of those quotes where you have to wonder if he was joking when he said it….Nah. Somehow I don’t think so.
No. 7: “Anytime Detroit scores more than 100 points and holds the other team below 100 points, they almost always win.” – Former NBA coach and current analyst Doug Collins
I was never great at math, I’ll admit. But I think I was good enough to at least to have made this statement with a bit more of a degree of certainly than Mr. Collins was.
No. 6: “I ain’t gonna be no escape-goat.” – Karl MaloneNBA legend Karl Malone wants to make sure you do not confuse him with a fleeing, domesticated animal kept around for its milk and frisky behavior.
NBA legend Karl Malone wants to make sure you do not confuse him with a fleeing, domesticated animal kept around for its milk and frisky behavior.
No. 5: “Therapy can be a good thing; it can be therapeutic.” – Alex Rodriguez
You don’t say, A-Rod?! It’s almost like the word therapeutic has the word therapy as its root, or something! Maybe in the wake of his declining baseball career, A-Rod can find a new job as a motivational speaker.
No. 4: “I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father.” – Greg Norman
To my knowledge, mom and dad are generally the only parents you actually have. But maybe things were a bit different in the Norman household.
No. 3: “I’m the oldest I’ve ever been, right now.” – Former MMA fighter Tim Sylvia
This is the type of quote you get attributed to you when you’re trying too hard to say something insightful. It’s OK, Tim. We’ve all said something before that didn’t come out the way we intended.
No. 2: “We’re going to turn this team around 360 degrees.”- Jason Kidd
Surefire NBA Hall of Famer Jason Kidd probably would not have made a great aerospace engineer, judging by this quote.
No. 1: “They shouldn’t throw at me. I’m the father of five or six kids.”- Tito Fuentes
If this list has shown us anything, it’s that athletes can be bad with numbers. But this takes bad math to a whole new level. I’m betting Tito has at least seven or eight children to his credit.